If I had (370) Million Dollars

Like 90% of the residents of the 12 states that participate in the Mega Millions lottery, I bought a lottery ticket today. The other 10% are either dying in hospitals and unable to express their desire to buy a ticket or living in Florida for the winter and were unable to buy a ticket.

Now, I normally don’t buy lottery tickets. But today I bought one. Really, I only bought a chance. God knows, with my chances being 1 in 176,145,920 of winning, I didn’t really buy a chance to win. What I really bought from my friendly neighborhood lotto and liquor dealer was the chance to dream.

Now most people, when asked what they would do if the won some overly enormous lottery, gush on and on about how they would open a home for wayward kittens or honest politicians or other members of society who just don’t get a fair shake in life.

But as I don’t really think I am going to win, I am certainly not going to waste my chance at dreaming by thinking how I could help other people. If I won the lottery (which I know I won’t) I would spend every last little penny on me and my gardening.

The first order of business would be to buy a new garden. Granted, I love my little postage stamp garden, but bigger is better, especially when you can afford to buy… I mean, hire a few dozen landscapers to help you out.

I have always had an eye on Martha Stewart‘s Skylands estate, once home to the Ford family. She paid a mere $5 million for it and I am sure that I could convince her to part with it for a few million more. Let’s face it, I would have money to spare.

Then again, it pays to shop around. I could just pick up the latest Open Days Directory and do a little window shopping, so to speak, and have my pick of the best private gardens in the United States.

I would most defiantly have to become eccentric. One just can not go through the shock of becoming richer than 50% of Paris Hilton’s closest friends without experiencing some sort of mental damage.

And in my newly found eccentric ways, I would build gigantic garden decor. 30 foot gnomes, bird baths suitable for pterosaurs and a plastic flamingo that would frighten any life loving alligator.

And a green house. Aw hell, I might just stop living in a real house and just take up permanent residence in a green house. You know what they say about glass houses though… The maid just has fit when it comes time to wash the windows.

I suppose I would have to do some acts of charity. Let me see, what would I do? I would make my garden a private hunting reserve for deer hunters. I would create a refuge for abandoned and abused house plants. And no school or educational garden within a 100 mile radius would be without plants and supplies for their projects.

Yep, there are alot of things that I could do with $370 million dollars. And for the low, low price of a dollar, I get to dream about what I would do with it all when (not gonna happen) I win.